As I am finalizing and beginning to compile addresses for our guest list, I am slowly but surely realizing the guest list is spiraling out of control. At first I was worried that since most of our guests were long distance that we weren't going to have enough, now I’m worried that we will have too many. Our Event Coordinator told us when we booked the venue the maximum people the room would fit comfortably was 130. At that time we assumed we were well in the clear with planning for 100.Once I started emailing friends for addresses I found out that some of Groomzilla’s college buds now have new girlfriends. I certainly don’t mind giving a plus one to those that are in a committed relationship or to friends that are dating someone we have actually met but what about those plus ones that we haven't ever met? I know some individuals feel uncomfortable attending weddings alone, I definitely get that, but is it totally and completely rude to disregard the new girlfriends and not include a plus one on the invite?
Other friends have had horror stories of guests bringing a plus one when not indicated on the invite, RSVP’ing yes with a no show, or those showing up who didn’t RSVP at all. I’m not totally naive and know some of these pitfalls may happen to us, and at that point I will just have to look past it and enjoy my day.
What types of unplanned guest pitfalls did you have?
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10 comments:
I really hope we don't have too many unplanned guests! I'm hoping the people we invited will have enough tact! I hope the same for you too! Especially when you're so close to your maximum capacity!
The plus-one thing is hard, definitely. I had a REALLY hard time with friends/family who were casually dating someone and expected to bring them to the wedding. Can you look at your "guaranteed no's" (the people who you have to invite but know they won't come) and see if that number would equal the unexpected plus-ones? We did that and it ended up working out.
The plus one thing sucks. There are a few plus ones that I wish I had allowed but for the most part, they are not even in the picture anymore. You just have to use your best judgement and stick to it.
Our rule for the plus ones was 'no house, no spouse, no ring, no bring'. I think that if they are not in a serious relationship then they shouldn't be allowed to bring just anyone. I don't want to look back on my pictures and think... who is that? The only except we made was for one person who only knew 1 or 2 other people and I didn't want to make them feel awkward.
We were the same way about plus one's, if they were just started dating someone or werent in a relationship at all then we didnt give them a plus one. But we did have some people RSVP and not show up at all. It was really sad and got us a little upset, but we knew it could happen because we've heard stories too!
Good luck.
OMigosh girl! You sound JUST like me. I was so worried no one would be at our wedding....now it seems like we'll have way too many! And, I'm with you...if you are in a committed relationship and I have met your significant other then by all means you should have a date, but I refuse to pay for a rando to come and eat dinner. I'm so annoyed because since being engaged almost every one of my single friends is now in a relationship....so there's another 15 people on my list. UGH!
I totally get what you mean and I hope you will manage to organize them all, sweetie. Have a lovely day. Muah
Ps: I’m hosting a beautiful skirt GIVEAWAY today! Perfect for summer picnics!
We didn't have any uninvited guests show up... but we had a lot of people RSVP 'yes' and not show up at all. We also had quite a few friends who were dating people we had not met before, so we sent the invitation with 1 seat reserved, and made sure to tell them that we were on a budget and had a strict guest maximum, and that we would let them know closer to the wedding if they could bring their dates or not. It ended up working out well, as we had a lot of 'no's' so we had plenty of space for their +1's! I know it's not the most appropriate method etiquette wise, but it worked, and our friends understood!
My husband had a lot of single friends, and we didn't want them just bringing some random date. However, we did let a couple of the groomsmen bring dates as they were apart of our bridal party and we just thought it would be a nice thing to do for them to be able to have a much more fun time at the wedding.
My advice is, if you want people dancing all night and having a good time think about the amount of single people you will have there and make sure there's a pretty good mx of guys and girls so they can meet and dance/have fun. If there isn't, consider letting your single friends bring dates so they wind up having a good time. Otherwise, you'll have a bunch of dudes or gals just sitting at their table or talking on the sidelines.. no fun!
I wish my guest was only around 100. I have a minimum of 200 that we have to met, and we well over that.
I just letting whoever wants to bring a plus one, because this wedding is so big. I have a lot of friends who don't know each other, and this way if they bring someone, they can have someone to talk to if they're not really good at socializing with new people.
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